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'Y'all are never right'

The assembled media gathered in Hoover, stroked their collective beards, and wondered who would win the SEC West. After peering into their crystal ball, the wise men's voices were heard: Auburn would win.

So, only 70 of the hundreds of journalists gathered at the Wynfrey voted. That's a better turnout that some primary elections.

But Tuberville wanted a recount.

"I was really excited till I got up this morning (and) you guys picked us to win the West," he told reporters during his Friday session at SEC Media Days. "Y'all are never right. That puts me in a bind. I don't know what I'm going to tell my team."

How about, "Again, the new offensive coordinator's name is Tony Franklin, and the new defensive coordinator's name is Paul Rhoads."

In fairness, Tony Franklin could not possibly do any worse than Al Borges' last season, when the transition of Brandon Cox's brain to oatmeal was completed and the Borges-"led" offense slumped to 101st in the nation.

And Rhoads will likely be less profane than Will Muschamp. He's a pretty good coach, too, having guided Pittsburgh to fifth in total defense last year. (Defense was no small part of the Panthers' stunning defeat of West Virginia in the finale, though it's easier when Pat White isn't in the game meowing his way to victory.)

Of course, this is nothing new for Tuberville. "I've gone through several over the years," he said, and that much is true. Most of that is because Tuberville's coordinators are upwardly mobile coaches who aren't likely to last long at any school before someone poaches them.

And Tuberville was also realistic about why his team was chosen by the media to top the West over the division's other Tigers.

"Well, I think it's because LSU doesn't have a proven quarterback either," he said. "I think if they had a quarterback coming back, I don't think there's any doubt, with the the type of players they're coming back with, with coming off of a national championship year, it would have been hard not to pick them."

In other words: When facing two teams with question marks, choose the team that has best handled those questions in the past. The coordinators at Auburn are new; they have been several times, and it's never stopped Auburn before.

That's enough to win the preseason beauty pageant. Whether it's enough to win the SEC West remains to be seen.