SEC Power Rankings: Jack Black.gif Edition

If you take the 30,000 foot view, the conference had an interesting weekend. Bama and LSU gave us an absolute classic, Florida and Georgia took care of business to remind the nation that they are very much top 10 teams, and Arkansas delivered one of the most spectacularly awful performances we have ever seen. The last one virtually ensures that after a quiet 2018, the coaching carousel in 2019 will be spinning fast and furious.

Now, if we keep the focus local...woof! Once again, we saw an unbalanced playbook that favored the passing game despite Hilinski struggling to consistently find receivers. On the ground, the Cocks only managed 34 sack adjusted rushing yards. Hell, this loss came at the hands of an offense that only managed to scrape together three explosive plays. The season has been utterly forgettable for Carolina so far, and this game seemed to be everything that has made it so long and crappy rolled into one.

Jack Black makes me smile. So, let’s look at Jack Black for a little bit.

1. LSU

Joe Burrow completed passes as he got hit, he completed them in tight coverage, and when there was nothing there he just ran for first downs. He went to Tua’s house and proved he’s the SEC’s BAMF.

2. Bama

They were down by 20 and it looked like they were going to come all the way back, but then that defense let Burrow and Edwards-Helaire do whatever they wanted whenever they wanted and LSU kept the game just out of reach. There’s nothing to do but just drink away the disappointment.

3. Georgia

When you realize you won’t have to go through Bama to win any kind of championship this year:

4. Florida

Scott Frost when he looks at this team and wonders if he chose the wrong job and then his secretary comes in to try to remind him everything he loves about Nebraska:

5. Auburn

When you realize no one at your current job likes you and Arkansas will probably offer you a lot of money:

6. Texas A&M

What it must be like to be an A&M fan:

7. Tennessee

Let’s look at exclusive video of Jeremy Pruitt addressing his team after a 1-4 start. I am told this is what gave the team the inspiration it needed to go 4-1 in its last 5 games.

8. Missouri

Missouri did everything right in the way it handled its NCAA investigation. They complied, they self-imposed penalties, but it didn’t matter. They got a bowl ban anyway. They are bowl eligible, but Barry Odom won’t be able to take his team to a third straight bowl game, so here’s a little something for the NCAA.

9. Mississippi State

Pssssst, Mississippi State! If there’s a chance Rutgers wants Joe Moorhead, maybe let him go.

10. South Carolina

No further comment necessary really.

11. Kentucky

Relax Kentucky fans. Look at the rest of your schedule. You’re going to make a bowl game.

12. Ole Miss

Look, Ole Miss is not out of this thing. If they win out, they’re going to a bowl.

*checks to see who is next on the schedule*

13. Vanderbilt

Vandy has been outscored 80-7 in its last 2 games. They had the ball for 7 minutes longer than Florida did on Saturday and somehow managed to let the Gators put up more than 4 times as many yards as they did. This isn’t just about Derek Mason. This team is a gold-painted turd.

14. Arkansas

¯\_(ツ)_/¯