SEC Power Rankings: Toy Story.gif Edition

Let’s get this out of the way right up front. I was in Brooklyn this weekend for my cousin’s wedding. That is where he grew up the son of two Greek immigrants. He has no concept of SoCon Saturday or Southern fall wedding etiquette.

He also happens to be someone I love dearly, so I wasn’t going to miss his big dy. Plus, my kids were in the wedding, so I kinda had to go. But don’t think for a second I didn’t let him know that one week either way, and I would have chosen football over him.

So, that is a long way of saying all I saw this weekend were highlights. Congrats to Jimmy, Ashley, and Jimbo Fisher for that guaranteed contract despite continuing not to do anything significant at at A&M. On to the rankings!

1. LSU

Just...I mean, just everything this offense does:

2. Georgia

This has to be how Kirby Smart feels any time Jake Fromm or any other quarterback shows up to a game.

3. Bama

Nick Saban to Oregon and his friend Mario Cristobal as he slowly watches things fall perfectly into place for Bama to get the 4 seed.

4. Florida

Florida fans are going to have to fake excitement for the Citrus Bowl after Georgia loses the SEC Championship game and gets bumped down to the Orange Bowl and the Sugar Bowl takes Bama so they can play Jalen Hurts and Oklahoma.

5. Auburn

Auburn fans on the Gus Malzahn era:

6. Texas A&M

Jimbo Fisher against ranked opponents:

7. Tennessee

I am always floored by the nostalgia people feel for their shitty, abusive coaches any time Jeremy Pruitt is caught on camera dragging one of his players around the sideline. We’re all adults now. We don’t have pretend to like jerks anymore just because they are adults and in charge.

8. Kentucky

Mark Stoops reportedly met with Florida State, but asked to be removed as a candidate for their job because he thought Kentucky had more to offer.

9. Mississippi State

Joe Moorhead the second after being named Mississippi State’s head coach:

10. Missouri

What it’s like to be Barry Odom:

11. South Carolina

Ray Tanner helping Will Muschamp prepare for the Clemson game, because if you’re going to lose by 28, screaming at the refs at least looks like you’re trying!

12. Ole Miss

Matt Luke rushes to his new AD’s office to start brown nosing.

13. Vanderbilt

Derek Mason after next week:

14. Arkansas

There is a word I want to use to describe this Arkansas defense...and their offense.